Thursday, June 23, 2011

The Art of Juggling

One of the hardest things about being a crossdresser is living a double life. At times I feel like i'm some kind of secret agent. In the daytime i'm a guy who works at night, a topic for another time, go to classes in the daytime and when i am off from work ; transform into Angie when i have the opportunity to do so.
It takes a toll both physically and mentally. Some are able to handle it better than others; sadly i am not one of them.  Despite this struggle i will not give up this lifestyle.  I feel accepted and enjoy the people that i have meet.

And so i have to struggle juggling both lives and do my best to find balance.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

One foot out the door

About four months ago I decided to take a leap of faith and come out about how being active in this lifestyle with one of four close friends.  It was very nerve wrenching and I waited for the right conversion to mention this. When I finally did, his response put me at ease. But he did warn me about mentioning this to the other three friends; especially my childhood friend.

The other day when we had an afternoon get together, he mentioned that he felt honored that I came out to him.

But I could never fully come out. Yeah I am 38 years old and live alone; but my family and extended family would likely further distance themselves from me. Even the possibility of loosing ties with the other three friends. 
Or worse be lectured by them about why, who and how wrong my lifestyle is.

How I started to be a crossdresser

It was about ten years ago that I had my first experience dressing up as a girl. As I am writing this, part of me thinks that I had these urges at an early age but was forced to supress since parents were from the old country and a bit old fashion. But also as I mentioned, it was hard for me to fit in and be accepted. Having this exposed would have made things even harder on me with my so-called classmates.

One day I decided to look for a place where I can have a makeover to look like a girl that was in my area but not too close home where people who know me will rat me out. I found a place out in Staten Island. My first makeover was a maid. Since then I have gone there whenever I wanted to have a makeover with a different look.

Some of the types of makeovers I had ranged from maid to goth and bride to goth bride.

So sfter my first makeover I started to seek out other CDs to make friends with and associate with; which I have and very happy to have meet them. The only problem I have that is preventing me from being more active in this lifestyle is my job and returning back to college.

I will post some of the different make-overs I had done. 

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Coming soon

Sorry for not posting an blog entries been busy and tired lately.
I will post about three different entries on Monday including some caption photos.